Monday, January 26, 2009

If Lyricists were Ice Cream Flavors

Bob Dylan: Chocolate
Chocolate is a very classic flavor, but you can still find surprises when mixed with various toppings or combined with other flavors.

Lil Wayne: Vanilla
Vanilla plays nice with other flavors like no other. Any topping you wanna put on it, any ice cream flavor you wanna scoop next to it will work just fine, whether it's crushed Oreos, caramel or Fall Out Boy.
Ryan Adams: Cherry Garcia
Unabashedly proud of being a rock'n'roll historian who mines the past for present inspiration. Also, Cold Roses has a bit of a Grateful Dead sound.
The Wu-Tang Clan: Neapolitan
Multiple flavors bangin' up against each other for some delicious shit.
Eddie Vedder (Pearl Jam): Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough
Tastes very good, but the chunks of cookie dough and chips make chewing very necessary. Also having too much cookie dough results in "Bushleaguer" and other spoken-word songs.
Joe Strummer (The Clash): Coffee
Very wildly energetic, but sometimes you just want something simpler and smoother that doesn't make you get up and do so much.
Jarvis Cocker (Pulp): Mint Chocolate Chip
Always fresh and delicious with the chocolate always around to add some extra diversity to it.
Pete Wentz (Fall Out Boy): Friendly's Ice Cream Sundae
So much ice cream and topping it could be argued that it's trying to pack too much into a small treat. And a banana either for flashing in his blog or impregnating Ashlee Simpson -- I can't decide which!
Kanye West: Vanilla frozen yogurt
Not a real ice cream.

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